Loving someone with body dysmorphia disorder (BDD) can be challenging, but it’s also a profound opportunity to show your love, compassion, and support. Recent studies report that this disorder is much more common in girls than boys which affects about 1.8% of girls, but only 0.3% of boys. This blog offers guidance on understanding BDD, recognising its symptoms, and finding ways to help your girlfriend navigate this difficult journey with empathy and love.

What is Body Dysmorphia?

What is Body Dysmorphia

Body Dysmorphia Disorder (BDD) is a mental health condition characterised by an obsessive focus on perceived flaws or defects in one’s appearance. These flaws are often unnoticeable to others but can cause significant distress and impair daily functioning. BDD is not just about vanity; it’s a serious psychological disorder that can deeply impact a person’s life.

Symptoms of People with Body Dysmorphia

Symptoms of People

People with BDD often engage in repetitive behaviours aimed at fixing or hiding their perceived flaws. It’s important to recognise the signs for better care and treatment:

  1. Excessive Grooming: Spending an inordinate amount of time grooming, applying makeup, or picking at the skin.
  2. Comparison: Frequently comparing their appearance to others.
  3. Camouflaging: Using clothing, makeup, or hairstyles to hide perceived flaws.
  4. Constant Reassurance: Seeking frequent reassurance about their appearance from others.
  5. Mirror Checking: Constantly checking their appearance in mirrors.
  6. Seeking Surgery: Pursuing cosmetic procedures in an attempt to correct perceived flaws.
  7. Avoiding Social Interactions: Withdrawing from social activities and photographs due to fear of judgement.

Causes of Body Dysmorphia

Causes of Body Dysmorphia

Understanding the causes of Body Dysmorphic Disorder (BDD) is crucial in recognising the complexity of this condition. Although the exact cause of BDD remains unknown, research suggests that a combination of genetic, neurological, and environmental factors may contribute to its development. Here’s a closer look at each of these factors:

1. Family History of BDD

Genetics play a significant role in the development of BDD. Studies have shown that individuals with a family history of BDD or other mental health disorders are more likely to develop the condition themselves. For example, traits related to anxiety, obsessive-compulsive tendencies, or perfectionism may be passed down through generations, heightening the risk of developing BDD.

2. Brain Abnormalities

Research into the neurological underpinnings of BDD has revealed that differences in brain structure and neurochemistry may contribute to the disorder. Brain imaging studies have shown that individuals with BDD often have abnormalities in regions of the brain associated with visual processing and emotional regulation. These abnormalities can affect how a person perceives their appearance and processes negative emotions related to their self-image. Additionally, imbalances in neurotransmitters, such as serotonin, may also play a role in the development of BDD, influencing mood and anxiety levels.

3. Environmental Factors

Environmental factors are significant contributors to the onset of BDD. Negative experiences such as bullying, teasing, or criticism about one’s appearance can have a lasting impact on self-esteem and body image. In addition to societal and cultural pressures experiences such as abuse or significant life changes, can also trigger or worsen symptoms of BDD. 

How BDD Affects Personal Life

Recognising the profound ways BDD affects their personal life is the first step in providing meaningful support and encouragement.

Strained Personal Relationships

Strained Personal Relationships

People with BDD often struggle with maintaining healthy relationships due to their intense preoccupation with their appearance. This can manifest in several ways. They may avoid social interactions to prevent others from seeing their perceived flaws which can lead to loneliness and feelings of alienation. And loved ones might feel helpless, frustrated, or unsure of how to provide support.

Impact on Work and School Performance

Impact on Work

People with BDD find it difficult to concentrate and perform effectively in professional or academic settings. Preoccupation with appearance-related thoughts can make it difficult for them to focus on tasks at hand. They may also avoid public speaking, networking, or other activities crucial for career growth. This behaviour can result in missed opportunities, poor performance, and disciplinary action.

Emotional and Mental Health Challenges

Emotional and Mental Health

The constant worry and dissatisfaction with their appearance can have severe emotional and mental health consequences. Persistent fear of being judged or ridiculed for their appearance can contribute to depression. Individuals may experience persistent sadness, hopelessness, and a lack of interest in activities they once enjoyed.

Daily Life Disruptions

Daily Life Disruptions

BDD will also interfere with even the most routine daily activities such as going to the gym, swimming, or participating in social gatherings. Individuals might neglect their physical health, hygiene, or nutrition due to their preoccupation with their perceived flaws.

Dangers of BDD

Dangers of BDD

BDD can lead to serious consequences if left untreated:

  • Emotional Suffering: Chronic depression and anxiety.
  • Risky Behaviours: Pursuit of unnecessary and risky cosmetic procedures.
  • Suicidal Thoughts: In severe cases, individuals may feel hopeless and consider self-harm.

So, How to Help Your Girlfriend with Body Dysmorphia?

Supporting your loved one with Body Dysmorphia Disorder (BDD) requires a great deal of patience, empathy, and understanding. Your support can significantly impact their journey towards recovery. Here are some detailed ways to help:

1. Educate Yourself

Educate Yourself

Understanding BDD is the first step in offering effective support.

  • Research BDD: Read books, articles, and trusted online resources about BDD. This knowledge will help you grasp what your girlfriend is experiencing and how it affects her daily life.
  • Attend Workshops or Support Groups: If available, attend workshops or support groups for friends and family of people with BDD. This can provide deeper insights and practical advice.

2. Be Patient

Be Patient

Recovery from BDD is a slow and often non-linear process. So, it is very important to be patient and wait for the result.

  • Avoid Pressuring Her: Understand that change takes time and setbacks are part of the journey. Encourage her progress, no matter how small, and avoid setting unrealistic expectations.
  • Celebrate Small Wins: Acknowledge and celebrate small steps towards recovery. This positive reinforcement can boost her confidence and motivation.

3. Listen to Your Girlfriend

Listen to Your Girlfriend

Create a safe and supportive environment for open communication.

  • Active Listening: Pay close attention to what she says without interrupting. Show that you are genuinely interested in understanding her feelings.
  • Validate Her Feelings: Acknowledge her emotions without judgement, even if they seem irrational to you. Validation can make her feel heard and supported.

4. Encourage Professional Help

Encourage Professional Help

Professional intervention is crucial for managing BDD effectively.

  • Suggest Therapy: Encourage her to see a therapist who specialises in BDD. Cognitive-behavioral therapy (CBT) is particularly effective in treating BDD.
  • Offer to Accompany Her: If she is comfortable, offer to accompany her to therapy sessions or support group meetings. Your presence can provide additional comfort and encouragement.

5. Avoid Negative Comments

Avoid Negative Comments

Comments about appearance can trigger anxiety and worsen BDD symptoms.

  • Be Mindful of Your Words: Refrain from making any comments about her appearance, even if they are meant as compliments. Focus on other aspects of her personality and achievements.
  • Set Boundaries: Gently steer conversations away from topics that may lead to negative self-talk or reinforce her preoccupations with her appearance.

6. Focus on Positives

Focus on Positives

Highlight her strengths and qualities that are not related to appearance.

  • Compliment Non-Appearance Qualities: Praise her for her intelligence, kindness, creativity, or any other qualities you admire.
  • Encourage Hobbies and Interests: Support her in pursuing hobbies and activities that make her feel accomplished and fulfilled. This can help shift her focus away from appearance concerns.

7. Build a Supportive Environment

Build a Supportive Environment

Create an environment that fosters positivity and well-being.

  • Promote Healthy Lifestyle Choices: Encourage activities that promote overall well-being, such as regular exercise, a balanced diet, and sufficient sleep.
  • Limit Social Media Exposure: Suggest taking breaks from social media, which often perpetuates unrealistic beauty standards and can exacerbate BDD symptoms.

8. Be a Role Model

Be a Role Model

Your behaviour and attitudes can influence her outlook.

  • Practice Self-Love: Demonstrate self-acceptance and positive self-talk. Show that it’s okay to have imperfections and that they do not define a person’s worth.
  • Maintain Open Communication: Keep the lines of communication open. Regularly check in on her feelings and experiences, will make her feel that she is with the right person.

9. Seek Support for Yourself

Seek Support for Yourself

Supporting someone with BDD can be emotionally challenging.

  • Find Your Support Network: Connect with friends, family, or support groups to share your experiences and seek advice.
  • Practice Self-Care: Ensure you are taking care of your own mental and emotional health. You can’t pour from an empty cup, so it’s important to stay balanced and healthy.

10. Respect Her Journey

Respect Her Journey

Understand that BDD is a complex disorder and recovery is personal.

  • Respect Her Boundaries: If she is not ready to talk or take certain steps, respect her boundaries while gently encouraging her.
  • Be Consistent: Show consistent support and love. Knowing you are a stable presence in her life can provide significant comfort and reassurance.

Celebrity Stories about Overcoming BDD

Hearing about celebrities who have struggled with Body Dysmorphia Disorder (BDD) and found ways to overcome it can be incredibly motivating. These stories not only highlight their challenges but also offer insights into the strategies and support systems that helped them heal. 

Robert Pattinson

Lili Reinhart

Hayden Panettiere

Best Books for Understanding Body Dysmorphic Disorder

Reading can be a powerful tool for understanding and coping with BDD. Here are some recommended books:

Best Books for Understanding

Best Cognitive-Behavioral Therapy in the US

Here are some top-rated CBT centres and online services in the US based on customer experiences, reviews, and ratings. 

1. Cognitive Behavioural Therapy – Los Angeles (CBT LA)

Cognitive Behavioral Therapy

CBT LA is highly regarded for its specialized treatment plans and professional therapists. Patients have praised the centre for its comprehensive approach and effective treatment strategies. Many reviews highlight the supportive environment and the therapists’ expertise in treating a range of disorders, including BDD. 

2. The Center for Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (Center for CBT) – Media, PA

Center for CBT

It is another highly-rated facility. Reviews on platforms like BirdEye reflect a high level of patient satisfaction, with many noting the caring and knowledgeable staff. The centre is known for its personalised treatment plans and supportive therapeutic environment, helping patients achieve significant improvements in their mental health.

3. Beck Institute for Cognitive Behaviour Therapy – Philadelphia, PA

Beck Institute for Cognitive Behavior

Founded by Dr. Aaron Beck, the creator of CBT, the Beck Institute is renowned for its cutting-edge research and high-quality therapy services. Patients appreciate the institute’s evidence-based approach and the expertise of its therapists. The institute offers both in-person and online therapy sessions, making it accessible to a wider audience.

4. BetterHelp

BetterHelp

For those seeking online therapy, BetterHelp is a top choice. It is highly rated for its convenience and accessibility, offering video, phone, and text sessions with licensed therapists. BetterHelp has received positive reviews for its user-friendly platform and the ability to switch therapists if needed. Customers appreciate the flexibility of scheduling and the availability of various specialized therapists, including those experienced in treating BDD.

5. Calmerry

Calmerry

It is another excellent online therapy option, praised for its affordability and responsive therapists. It offers video and unlimited messaging sessions, making it a convenient choice for those who prefer digital communication. Calmerry is noted for its quick therapist matching process and positive customer feedback regarding the quality of care provided.

Disclaimer: For more detailed information about these therapy centers and others, you can visit their respective websites or check out comprehensive reviews on platforms like Healthline and Everyday Health​.

Your Role in Her Recovery

How to Help Your Girlfriend with Body Dysmorphia is a journey that demands empathy, understanding, and unwavering support. By educating yourself about BDD, encouraging professional help, and cultivating a positive environment, you can significantly aid her in navigating this challenging path. Remember, your love and patience are invaluable tools in her recovery process. Together, you can build a brighter, more confident future.